Sunday, November 15, 2009

Leila's Birth Story

First, some pictures...it took a ridiculous number of attempts to get this one good picture of Leila. It is hard to get a flattering picture of a newborn!

Kaia is so proud that she can hold Leila on her own. I've caught her trying to pick her up on her own a couple of times.

I'm never able to take pictures of Asher near Leila because I have to keep a close watch on what's happening. He loves her too much sometimes! Putting these glasses on Leila was his doing:


I’ll admit it. I am a passionate advocate of natural birth. Here’s why: my two natural birth experiences have been THE MOST exhilarating and empowering experiences of my life. No other experience I’ve had has even come close to replicating the feelings of empowerment I’ve had immediately following Asher’s and Leila’s births. In fact, Asher’s birth triggered a change in me where I became more assertive and began pursuing personal goals with much more zeal than I ever had before. If I could give birth completely naturally, I could do anything!

Let me make clear, first of all, that I am very grateful for modern technology. I am so grateful that C-sections are as safe as they are so that Kaia could be born safely (she was breech). Second, I do not in any way judge those who use drugs to get through labor. But I do wish people would be more willing to give natural birth a shot.

At the beginning of this pregnancy, I heard about the Hypnobabies program, a self-study course to prepare for labor and birth by learning to deeply relax. I was a little skeptical of the claim that labor could be pain-free using this program, but I figured that since I made it through Asher’s labor just using my own resources and intuition, it certainly couldn’t hurt to prepare for labor using Hypnobabies. Here’s a brief explanation from the website: “Many people think hypnosis is like the stage hypnosis shows they've seen where people seem to be unable to control themselves, act goofy and provide entertainment for the audience.
 In reality it is a state of focused concentration where the body and mind relax together. Hypnosis is very simply: a natural state of mind in which the body and mind are extremely relaxed and yet the mind is also highly aware and focused.”

On to the actual birth story…My mom flew in on Tuesday evening (November 3). At the time my mom flew in, I was having Braxton Hicks contractions but nothing painful. I woke up the next morning around 7:15 feeling crampy. I wasn't sure if it meant anything so Peter left for work. By 8:00 a.m. I started timing contractions; they were every 5 minutes lasting 1 minute each! I didn’t want Peter to come home if this was false labor, but my mom convinced me to call Peter and tell him he'd better come home!

By the time Peter got home and we finished packing the hospital bag, it was 10:00 when we were heading out the door. Both my mom and Peter were completely stressed about me getting to the hospital in time, but I was so relaxed. During each contraction, I would just stop where I was and rock my hips back and forth as I focused all my energy internally. Kaia's farewell to us was "Birth in the car! Definitely yes!" Fortunately we made it to the hospital without having a birth in the car. By the time we got into the hospital, it was about 10:45.

I had been hoping to labor in a birthing tub, but by the time we got there I just knew that I wasn't going to have time to get in a tub. When Peter mentioned this to me (he knew how important that had been to me), I said that I’d rather have a fast labor than a tub labor.

The nurse checked me when we first got there; I was dilated to a 4, and my contractions were about every 3 minutes. I had the same problem in this labor as in Asher's - the contraction monitor never showed my contractions going past 40% intensity even though I knew they were much more intense than that. In fact, I later learned that when the midwife first arrived, the nurse suggested that they might want to send me home because she didn't believe I was really going to give birth anytime soon. The midwife came in, looked at me and then at the monitor, and asked me how intense my contractions really were (I looked so relaxed that she didn’t believe I was very far along in my labor). I told her the contractions were pretty intense. She decided to check me and was shocked to find that I was dilated to an 8 - I had gone from a 4 to an 8 in half an hour!

I got off the bed and onto a birthing ball. Being on the birthing ball was incredibly helpful. Rocking my hips back and forth made the contractions much more bearable. Even still, the contractions were getting pretty intense pretty quickly. The midwife could tell by my reaction to the contractions that things were speeding up, so she suggested that if I got up on the bed on my side, the baby might be ready to come out. I stood up and immediately felt the baby ready to come out. The feeling of her dropping terrified me, so I sat immediately back down on the ball! I was worried about that next step. With encouragement from the midwife and Peter, I stood up again and got on the bed at 12:24. My water broke on its own at 12:25, and after 6 intense minutes of pushing, Leila was born at 12:31 p.m.

My birth experience was very intense but so worth it. I’m not sure whether or not I would say that the labor was pain-free. I would definitely say it was more intense than it was painful. Pushing was painful – thank goodness that only lasted 6 minutes. It was amazing to give birth completely naturally. I learned in the next couple of days that of the 9 babies our pediatric nurse was in charge of, ours was the only baby not born by C-section.

The long and short of my experience is that I completely recommend natural birth and the Hypnobabies program. Here in summation, are a few of the things that using Hypnobabies did for me:
• I would usually listen to the program on my iPod after middle-of-the-night trips to the bathroom. During my previous pregnancies, I would often lie awake for a long time before falling asleep even though I would be extremely tired. Listening to my hypnosis would put me to sleep, usually within minutes! The program still works if you fall asleep because your subconscious mind is absorbing all the messages. (It may sound hokey, but I’m convinced it works!) The price of the program was honestly worth it just for the great sleep I had after listening.

• I felt wonderful this entire pregnancy. The Sunday before I had Leila, people at church were asking how I was feeling and I felt like saying that I was feeling too good to be having a baby within days. I attribute this to the Hypnobabies – the relaxation that came from practicing decreased the degree to which I felt the aches and pains I’ve had in my previous pregnancies.

• I felt very empowered through the Hypnobabies program even while pregnant. The program focuses on how you, as the pregnant woman, are able to make your own decisions for yourself and your baby. This encouragement led me to switch from my OB to midwives at about 6 months pregnant. I’ve never regretted that decision.

• I wholeheartedly believe that my labor was only 4 ½ hours because I was so relaxed; instead of fighting against the pain, my body worked with the contractions to get Leila here so quickly.

• I was also able to use my Hypnobabies to get through the afterbirth pains – those really do get worse with each birth! Relaxing during them made them much more bearable.

• Although I was so grateful that I had a natural birth with Asher, for months afterwards, every time I thought about or talked about the labor, my stomach would start clenching up and I would almost feel sick to my stomach. I don’t feel that at all when thinking about Leila’s birth. I guess the relaxation I felt during the labor made a difference even in how I remember the laboring experience.

16 comments:

Paula said...

I'm so glad you reviewed your experience with the hypnobabies program. I've been interested in hypnobirthing but didn't know anyone who had actually done it. I'll have to look into that!
I have not yet settled on an option I am happy with for this baby's birth. I loved having a midwife-delivered water birth with the last one--but it was such a fluke under the circumstances I could never duplicate it. The only hospital nearby with midwives is the Kaiser Permanente one, and I would have to be with Kaiser insurance for that--an option
I have but it locks you into only Kaiser Drs. etc. and I have to make that decision during the next couple of weeks before our open season ends. I'm considering home birth but not sure if I am comfortable with it...
Leila is beautiful, and I can see both mom and dad in her. I'm so happy for you that you had a good birth experience. I too have found natural birth to be incredibly enpowering--I've been trying to figure out why it is for some people and not for others.

Jenn said...

Thanks for posting your story. I'm definitely going the natural route with #3, so this is very helpful. Did you buy the complete hypnobabies home study course, or just a few cds? What did you find the most useful? I think I'll definitely look into it. Congratulations, by the way. She is gorgeous!

ashley said...

wow maile, what a wonderful story! i am SO glad that things went so well for you. i can't believe that your labor was SO short! congratulations on the great pregnancy, labor, birth and beautiful baby :-)
reading your story i was getting excited again for when i get to have another baby (definitely not for another three years at least, but i can still be excited :-) for the potential to have such an empowering birth experience. i never felt out of control or upset with how edie's birth went, but at the same time, i have a feeling of what a completely natural birth would mean to me and i am just so excited to get the chance to try again!
thanks again for your story

gretchen said...

First of all, Leila is so darling! I think she looks so much like Asher!

Thanks so much for sharing your birth story; I'm so glad you had a great experience and Leila arrived safely and so quickly. I'm looking forward to starting to listen to my scripts again in the next couple of weeks!

Lulu said...

Yeah! I'm excited that things went so well for you! Good thing your mom told you to call Peter home from work...haha, I had a similar experience like that w/ Carlos. Except he wasn't at work, he was over 1200 miles away. lol
Anyway, she's darling, can't wait to see her in real life!
And yes, she does look like Asher, I'm sure he's absolutely thrilled!

Jennie and Adam said...

Wow--the glowing review of hypnobabies is almost enough to make me consider it! I love that you felt so empowered--what a great way to bring a baby into the world. Thanks again for sharing your experience!

Sara said...

I love your story. I am so glad you did it and shared your thoughts. I am also a very strong advocate of natural births. We did it three and half times. (Brookie was a an epidural that didn't work and went bad) and I would not have had it any other way. I loved the recovery and the whole experience. She is such a sweet baby girl. I think she looks like a combination of the family. Well done Maile!

Kristi said...

Very interesting Maile! I'm so happy it worked for you and that you had such a positive birthing experience. You are a brave woman!! She is lovely and I hope you are enjoying her! Post more pictures!

Emily said...

I've been meaning to call you and ask your story, so thanks for posting. I'm glad it went so well and so quick...I love the quick labors too (I'm convinced natural labors are much quicker than others). I know what you mean about natural lavor being empowering. All 3 of mine have been great and my recoveries so quick. I haven't done hynobabies, but I guess I just know how to relax myself cause the doctors and nurses are always shocked when they find out I'm ready to push cuase they can't tell by my face (just like with you). Word of warning though...I've found that after my really quick labor with Michael that the next 2 have gone back up in time (2 hours, 4 hours, 6 hours) 6 Hours still isn't bad though. :) Leila is beautiful and I'm excited that we are going to bless our babies on the same day. WE'll have to get pictures. :) Take care

Mistie said...

good for you. I would be so proud if i were you. I can imagine it makes you feel empowered. And btw- i cant imagine an unflattering picture of her...she is gorgeous! Seriously!! Congrats...

Jess said...

She's adorable! I love how by the time you have baby #3 you can really tell what the kids in a family look like. I'm glad you had such a positive experience.

MaryAnne said...

Leily is beautiful, and Kaia is looking so grown up!

I listened to part of a hypnobabies CD when I was pregnant with my first baby, and the voice just cracked me up and I couldn't bring myself to focus on their lessons. So, I gave it up. But after reading your review I would probably give it another go. Actually, I would do just about anything to not have a repeat of my labor experiences with babies #2 and 3. The sad thing is, my experience having my first baby was very similar to what you've described with Leila...

Monson Family said...

Well I think you might have sold me. I am seriously considering doing the hypnobabies program!

I'm glad you had such a great experience! And woohoo for a quick labor!!!

lori said...

Thanks so much for sharing this, Maile! How inspiring! And those pictures - SO PRECIOUS! She's just beautiful!

Deanna said...

Hi Maile, I was in your freshman ward, I don't know if you remember me, but I just saw your blog from your comment on Lori's and was so happy to hear your experiences with Hypnobabies! I did it with my first birth and am doing it again with my 2nd. I'm 7 months pregnant. I love hearing about women having good experiences with it. It's so inspiring and amazing. Yay for hypnobabies and natural birth :) Congrats on your daughter!

Emily said...

hahaha, I just noticed on my post that I put "all 3 of my labors"....I have 4 kids...yikes, that's scary that I don't even know how many kids I have. I must be losing my mind!!!